#7 National Eat Pizza Day

National eat pizza day is on September 22nd. I decided to create this holiday to thank the Italians for being the ones who introduced pizza to the world. This is the easiest holiday to celebrate, all you have to do is eat pizza. Whether you want to go to the grocery store and buy the necessary ingredients to make your own delectable pizza from scratch. Or some people have been known to hit up all of the pizza hot spots in their city in just one day. It doesn't matter if you want to go all out on pizza eating or just grab a slice while your running errands. The most important thing is that you pay your appreciation to the food itself. Some pizza extremists have been known to decorate their cars, the inside and outside of their houses and even their office cubicles with Italian flags and pizza posters. National eat pizza day has no religion affiliated with it. So it is truly a chance for all pizza-lovers of America to join together and agree on at least one thing, that pizza is a beautiful thing. Everyone also treats Italians with the utmost respect on Nation eat pizza day. Of course these Italians living in our times didn't create pizza, but their ancestors did, so that is why no one is rude to Italians on September 22nd. So when September 22nd, 2009 rolls around, make sure to celebrate National eat pizza day in whatever way you can.

#6 Say Goodbye to the Jonas Brothers

It's true, I have outlawed the Jonas Brothers. It is now illegal for radio stations to play their so called music. Stores can no longer sell Jonas Brothers posters, cds and other novelty items. This new law has also put an end to their world tour. I am so sick of another boy/brother band singing lame songs about girls breaking up with them. They pretty much are girls by their awkward style and straightened hair. But I am putting an end to the maddness. With this new law, the ears of the world will be at ease now that the Jonas Brothers whiny songs can never be heard again. Anyone who chooses to break these laws will be punished. For the first offense, you will be forced to sit in a room and listen to an ipod, with good music on it, for two hours. For the second offense, you will have all Jonas Brothers items confiscated and also serve the same punishement as the first offense. And for the third offense, you will have the same punishment at the first and second offense, but you will also have to go to court, and a judge will determine your fate. I hope you think twice before listening to the Jonas Brothers, because these laws will be enforced. I hope you support me in my act to eliminate the Jonas Brothers from our music culture. Thank you.